Cord Crippler

That when bringing an old computer monitor to the dump or recycling spot, the cord will protest and wrap itself around your ankles tripping you and tossing you headlong down the granite steps outside your home. In an effort to break your fall you'll let go of the monitor and - similar to the motorcycle daredevil who abandons his cycle only to crash into it seconds later - you'll slice your arms to ribbons when you thrust your arms into the screen. The whole debacle will continue until you and the monitor, entangled in death, roll slowly to the curb where the trash guy will toss you both into the crusher.