Toe-tal Pain

That when you pull on a new sock the loose threads inside this mini garment tube will snack on your unkempt toenail and dramatically rip the appendage sideways, effectively shattering the tiny bone and turning you into a carnival freak for eternity (if there are any carnivals that would charge to see the mangled toe man).

Cat Tail Travesty

That while you watch the Tour de France on TV, you remain inside because of the constant rain. And while you watch you decide to increase your fitness by riding your bike trainer indoors. And while you ride your trainer, the cats you have raised from kittens decide to dash into the moving rear wheel.

Then, the shredded cat flesh and bones shoot upward at the speed of light and puncture your spine - rendering you paralyzed and unable to phone for help or even 'boop' 'boop' 'boop' through the commercials.

Neighbors find your decaying body among the cat detritus well after the TDF winner has been crowned.